God's Silence

A sentiment formed over the years out of disappointment

Grew in me against God, a grudge I left Him to judge

My grudge grew because of health and money, because of fame

Health, money, or fame that was my claim

"God!" said I, "Lord!"

I've been calling His Name for some time, years now, asking the same

Health, money, or fame that was my claim

I never heard a response, and it was God to blame

To all my claims, God responded with silence, I must say, indifference

"Ah!" Someone spoke, and I quote: "God only responds to the achievers."

Yet I, like most believers, feel that God speaks in Signs

That His Will comes in Signs, and we must interpret such Signs

But I tried and tried and viewed no such Signs

It was summer, and no snowflakes melted in my hand

It was fall, and no sprouts grew

It was winter, and no flowers bloomed

It was spring, and no leaves fell

Despite my prayers, God's silence persisted, and I insisted

I was imploring at the Temple's Door, pounding at the Temple's Door

Hammering my disenchantment, yes, my disappointment at the Temple's Door

And there was I, a lonely wretch aiming to impact God in a final stretch

Thumping at God's Door, expecting Signs like never before

And just where I was, pounding at the Temple's Door

Lightning fell, and on my knees, I fell

"Stand up!" The lightning broke, and these words a voice spoke

Whose voice I knew was He whom I feared no more

The voice again spoke, and I quote: "What you have is enough."

"What you need is gratitude!"

And I said: "Gratitude? Oh, my Lord, I'm not rude."

"It's not my Persistence but your Silence."

To my words, sparks of divine rage came down from Heaven

Striking on the Temple's Door

The Door split open, and a force pushed me onto the Temple's Floor

And I fell on my hands and touched no floor but burning land

And there was I, lying immobile over burning land

My Spirit, motionless, it was not

For my Spirit raised and pointed a finger to where the altar raised

And thus my Spirit spoke, and I quote:

"Listen, oh Lord! The man lying here whose Spirit I am

He asked You, but You granted not, oh Lord, what he asked!

He is Innocent of Punishment

He was not speaking about his whims but about Your Silence

For Your Silence hurts more than Your Words, oh Lord!

For if You measure what is Enough

I said that Your Words should be Enough

For is You who favour Acceptance or Rebuff."

But God did not answer, and there was I

Involved in a silence I had never heard before

Dying in silence on the Temple's Floor.